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Today's Tickles!
"A Flashback Funny"
YOU'RE NOT OLD UNLESS YOU CAN REMEMBER...
...being sent to the drugstore to test vacuum tubes for the TV.
...when Kool-Aid was the only other drink for kids, other than milk and sodas.
...when there were two types of sneakers for boys: high tops and low tops.
...when boys couldn't wear anything but leather shoes to school. (And shirts
tucked in, belts had to be worn, and skirts no higher than mid-knee.)
...when it took five minutes for the TV to warm up. (Remember watching test
patterns, and that itty-bitty screen?)
...when nearly everyone's parents smoked and cigarettes were $3 a carton.
...when all your friends got their hair cut at the kitchen table.
...when nearly everyone's mom was at home when the kids got there. (Usually
with hot homemade cookies and milk.)
...when nobody owned a pure-bred dog.
...when a dime was a decent allowance, and a quarter a huge bonus. (And penny
candy?)
...when you'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny.
...when girls neither dated nor kissed until late high school, if then.
...when all your teachers wore either neckties or had their hair done, every
day.
...when you got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without
asking, for free, every time. (And gas was 19 cents a gallon?)
...when any parent could discipline any kid, or feed him, or use him to carry
groceries, and nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it.
...when it was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a
REAL restaurant with your parents.
"God's Baseball Team"
Bob and the Lord stood by to observe a baseball game.
The Lord's team was playing Satan's team. The Lord's team
was at bat the score was tied zero to zero, and it was the bottom of the
ninth inning with two outs.
They continued to watch as a batter stepped up to the
plate whose name was Love.
Love swung at the first pitch and hit a single, because
Love never fails.
The next batter was named Faith, who also got a
single because Faith works with Love.
The next batter up was named Godly Wisdom.
Satan wound up and threw the first pitch.
Godly wisdom looked it over and let it pass.
Ball one!
Three more pitches and Godly Wisdom walked, because
Godly Wisdom never swings at what Satan throws.
The bases are loaded. The Lord then turns to Bob
and tells him He is now going to bring in His star player.
Up to bat stepped Grace.
Bob said "he sure doesn't look like much!"
Satan's whole team relaxed when they saw Grace.
Thinking he had won the game,
Satan wound up and fired his first pitch.
To the shock of everyone, GRACE HIT THE BALL
HARDER THAN ANYONE HAD EVER SEEN.
But Satan was not worried; his center fielder let
very few get by. He went up for the ball, but it went
right through his glove, hit him on the head and sent
him crashing to the ground. Then it continued over the
fence for a home run!
The Lord's team won.
The Lord then asked Bob if he knew why Love, Faith,
and Godly Wisdom could get on base, but could not win the game.
Bob answered that he did not know why.
The Lord explained, "If your love, faith and wisdom
had won the game, you would think you had
done it by yourself.
Love, Faith, and Wisdom will get you on base, but
only MY Grace can get you home. MY Grace is the only thing
Satan cannot steal."
May God go before you today and show you his Grace in everything you do.
Author Unknown - Received in email.
--Selected from Entourage Mantle .
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